Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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