you mean i was at the winter classic?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
