I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
