you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
