I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize
