Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize