I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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