I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize