So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
