laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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