i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
