I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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