Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Randomize
