It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
