I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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