based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
