I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
