My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
