end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
