Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
