I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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