Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
