the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
You made out with two different species that night
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Enjoy the penises
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize