there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
