Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Randomize
