When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize