i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
