im gay
i know
yea but for you.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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