You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
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