Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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