Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
You ate ashes out of my bong
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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