all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
We were destined to go to rehab together
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
