it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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