so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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