What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Randomize