you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize