Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
this just has baby written all over it
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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