Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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