how do flat chested girls get laid?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
