I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
