So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize