physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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