Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
MIDGETS
????
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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