Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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