I've blown a few things in my day
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
