My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
