i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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