Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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