I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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