Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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