did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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