did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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