look no pants
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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